Kitchen Project Update

Sandra and I went back to our house this morning to grab a couple things and check on the kitchen. With Markus' arrival, we tend to forget that the rest of the world continues to operate normally. The countertops have been installed and the cork floor has also been installed. We can really start picturing the finished product now. The next steps will be to put the hardware on the cabinets, install the appliances, and finish the electric/plumbing. Finally, we'll be finishing the backsplash/walls with Venetian Plaster, which my brother will help complete.

Photo update:

Happy Thanksgiving

Here is Markus getting his diaper changed (don't worry, it's not in the video) earlier today. He normally hates this process, but he was pretty calm about it in this video. Maybe he knows he's on camera and he doesn't want to let other people know he cries!

Markus and The Bobo (Pacifier)

Here's a quick video of Markus a little over a week old. It was taken with our digital camera. I have a feeling that Santa will bring us a digital camcorder for Christmas.

Frozen Foods!

One thing about completely redoing a kitchen is that you won't have a kitchen to use during the renovation! During the last few weeks before Markus was born, Sandra and I set up a little area in the livingroom to use as a kitchen. The microwave and crockpot were our choices, so we either cooked for 6 minutes or 6 hours! Anyway, we started to shop in the "taboo" Frozen Foods section of our supermarket. We were both newcomers to this aisle and were pretty surprised by the selection. We decided to pick up a few items that were on sale since we didn't have any particular brand preference. We started with Oscar Meyer Deli Creations Flatbread Chicken Sandwich and Honey, Ham & Swiss sandwich. They cost about $3.43 regularly, but they were on sale for half price. We were pleasantly surprised as we liked these sandwiches. The portions were a bit small though. Nonetheless, a good value for the sale. And so it started.... Here's a list of what we tried (at least what I wrote down):



In short, we really like the Stouffers brand foods, especially if its on sale! Also good were Ms T's Pierogi's. Although the Boston Market food ranked high, it was pretty expensive. At no point in your life should you ever eat anything made by Banquet. The nuggets, corn and mashed potatoes all tasted like water. Also not on the list was some Barron's Pizzas that were decent, but coming from New York, I really have a hard time eating home cooked pizzas. Compared to a good slice from a New York Pizzaria, they're crap.

Also, just about all of the portions on these meals felt too small. Although, that could be a problem with us, not the meal! At the end though, we're not as opposed to grabbing a few of these meals (on sale, of course) and having it in the freezer as a quick backup. They can really be a convenience.

Pediatrician Visit

This morning we took Markus to the pediatrician for his follow-up visit. The main thing that the doctor wanted to check was his weight gain. Markus' birth weight was 6 pounds, 15 ounces, his visit roughly one week later was 6 pounds, 12 ounces, and today he weighed in at a nice 7 pounds, 4 ounces! The doctor said that Markus looks good and his next visit will be in 2 months for his immunization shots.

Markus' 8 ounces in one week was a 7.4% weight gain from his previous weight. If you were a 200 pound person, that is the equivalent of gaining 14.8 pounds in a week. Good for babies, BAD for 200 pound adults!

Here's a picture of Markus and his 7 lbs 4 oz:

Markus first full bath

Last Tuesday, Markus' umbilical cord fell out! It was a pretty mild event. I was always apprehensive about this happening...for some reason I thought it would be..., well, weird. Nothing to it...it was just off in the morning.

Since his cord was off, we decided to give him his first "full" bath. The nurses told us to just sponge him every few days when his cord was on, and to wait to use water when it was off. Markus, as expected, cried during his bath. We tried singing, but to no avail. Anyway, we managed to get him cleaned up and smelling fresh! Here are some pics of the aftermath (no public naked photos!):

1 week old

As of 4:49 a.m. this morning, Markus is one week old! What a week! Sandra and I are very appreciative and thankful for all the love, support and kindness that all of our family, friends, and everyone we know has shown.

Here are some of my observations on the first week of being a parent:

• One week doesn't make sense to me as I'm sleeping, eating, and bathing irregularly. I'll look in the mirror and say, "when the hell did I grow this beard?". Sunday football was a surprise.
  
• Anxiety is awful! I have had random bouts of anxiety, but it seems to be getting better each day. My friends Sara (who has two beautiful children) tells me that's normal and it goes away, so I feel better.
• Markus is pretty clear in his demands. He cries when he's hungry. He fusses around and cries a little when he needs to be changed, or wants to be held, or needs to be burped. Right now he's eating around 2 ounces of formula every 3-4 hours. Sometimes he puts down 3 ounces, but most of the time it's two.
• I was terrified of babies before Markus, but now I just want to hold him all the time. I understand that this can be a problem in the future as he will need to learn to sleep by himself.

Well, that's pretty much all I know for the first week. Markus is doing great and mommy is doing well. As much as the focus is on Markus, Sandra is still recovering from surgery!

Anyway, here's a picture of Markus' first manicure:

Born: Markus Daniel Frydman

Sandra and I woke up on Saturday morning to run a couple of errands and have dinner at my parents' house. The first thing we did was go and pick out our granite slab for our kitchen. The next part of our day was a routine check up at the OBGYN. That's when everything changed...

Our doctor informed us that we would have to deliver the baby that day! Sandra's blood pressure had been rising and had reached a level of 140/80, a condition known as preeclampsia. Preeclampsia is high blood pressure due to pregnancy and the only "cure" is to deliver. Sandra has never had any blood pressure problems and the doctor was not worried, but concerned because the condition can go from mild to severe quickly. In addition, Sandra had trace amounts of protein in her urine and above average weight gain the past two weeks, which all were signs of preeclampsia. He instructed us to go home, get our hospital bag and meet him in the hospital later that night.

Things became pretty surreal quickly. We grabbed our stuff, ate at a McDonalds drive-thru on the way, and arrived at the hospital around 5:00 p.m. Saturday. To help treat the preeclampsia, Sandra had to be hooked up to an IV of magnesium, which helps relax and lower the blood pressure. This was upsetting as we had always hoped to get as close to a natural birth as possible. Nonetheless, for the health and safety of Sandra and the baby, this had to be done. In addition, the doctors started inducing the labor. This was all very scary and nerve-wracking. The induction started by softening the cervix with Cytotec, a drug that must be taken every 4 hours and at least three of them before another drug (Pitocin) is used to begin contractions. So twelve hours later (3 cytotec pills later -- 7:00 p.m., 11:00 p.m. and 3:00 a.m.), Pitocin was added to the IV and contractions began.

I can only describe the next 24 hours as a nightmare labor and delivery. Watching my beautiful wife being hooked up to an IV and having all these drugs pumped into her was really difficult to endure. I understood the conditions that we were up against, but it was tough. Not only was it tough for me to watch her, but knowing how much it was upsetting her was the hard part. I had to be there for her, to comfort her, and to help guide her through this delivery. Without getting into more detail, we tried this for a long time and each hour was agonizing to watch.

It was now sometime around midnight on Sunday when a new doctor came in and decided to speed things up by breaking Sandra's water. This increased the contractions, and Sandra was feeling intense pain. Sandra was great about the pain, but after so many hours, we got to the point where Sandra decided to have an epidural shot. I don't remember the time, but this was around Sunday night. The anesthesiologist explained that due to Sandra's MS, there was higher risk with an epidural. As if we weren't wound up tight enough, this was just another emotional and psychological setback for both of us. It was the right thing to do, but this was also a traumatic experience. The whole process took 15 minutes or so, as the doctor had to try a few times to get the epidural correct. They were being extra careful with Sandra. Those might have been the longest 15 minutes of my life. We were now entering 24+ hours of labor and the epidural helped calm Sandra down. In fact, I think Sandra was able to get some sleep during this time. By the way, that McDonalds meal and some pasta at the hospital when we arrived was all the Sandra had eaten/was allowed to eat. So hunger was another factor in this trauma.

The entire time there was a monitor for the baby's heart and it started around ~130-150 bpm, but later it slowed down to the 110 bpm baseline. I felt terrible, as I knew it was the preeclampsia drugs causing the slower rate. Nonetheless, this was still a healthy and acceptable rate. The issue started when Sandra was 7 centimeters dilated and at each contraction the baby's heart rate slowed to ~90 bpm. The doctor couldn't understand why this was happening and why the cervix didn't have the pressure of the baby's head. The decision to do a cesarean section was made, but again it was difficult because we'd been told that due to the MS, spinal anesthesia, the usual form for c-sections, was not possible and Sandra didn't want general anesthesia. The doctors explained they could do it through the epidural. Just more scariness to compound the already taxing experience.

The doctors took Sandra away to the operating room to prepare for the c-section. They gave me scrubs and told me to wait outside while they prepared. This was the first time over the course of the entire experience that I became very nervous and scared. I was alone in my operating uniform and just scared because the whole experience just felt wrong from the beginning. I tried to breathe slowly in and out, and I was just reflecting on the whole event. It was probably 10 minutes, but again it felt like a lifetime. They finally called me into the operating room.

I went behind the blue curtain to be next to Sandra, who was laid out on the table, loaded with drugs. Again, a difficult sight for me to handle, but it was all so surreal. Everything the doctor said made us scared. Finally, we heard the sound of a baby and the doctor asked us if we wanted to know if it was a boy or a girl. YES! It was a boy and we knew that Markus was born.

Since he was born early (anything earlier than 38 weeks is early, and Markus was 37 weeks 4 days), they had to take him to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). I was allowed to come around and see him being cleaned up, and then they put him down next to Sandra's face for some time. She couldn't touch him because of the way her arms were restrained for the surgery, but she was able to give him a kiss on the cheek and wish him a happy birthday. I was completely overwhelmed with emotion. The doctors then took Markus to the NICU.

As they were stitching Sandra up after the operation, Sandra could feel the pain of the sutures. This was absolutely terrible and I was so angry and upset. The anesthesiologist continued to pump morphine and who knows what into Sandra, but it wasn't working. Again, this lasted probably 15-20 minutes, but it felt like an eternity. FINALLY, it was all over and they carted off my wife to the recovery room. I left to walk back into the labor room and I just broke down and cried for a while. The weight of the past few days finally took its toll and I was also overwhelmed with joy about Markus.

Markus had to stay in the NICU because he had some magnesium in his blood so they put him on IV and didn't start feeding him yet. Babies who have magnesium have a hard time getting their digestive systems working. It was incredible and magical to see him, but also heartbreaking. I knew he was okay, and the nurses said he was fine. He was born 6 pounds, 15 ounces, so he was big for a premature baby. He looked peaceful and was just sleeping most of the time.

Sandra had to be on IV for 24 hours after the birth to help treat the blood pressure and they wouldn't allow her to see Markus during that time. Not to keep repeating myself, but this was very sad. I was allowed to go down and take pictures of Markus and then show them to Sandra. Although things were okay (in some weird way), the emotional battle continued.

After all of this turmoil (which included over 24 hours of IV antibiotics after Sandra spiked a fever on Tuesday night), we are happy and blessed that we have a healthy baby boy. Sandra got to see and feed Markus the next morning and we were discharged from the hospital on Thursday.

Our parenting now begins...

Commuting

The first thing we considered when we wanted to move was our commute. We wanted to make sure that the commute was less than an hour and a half each way. In Queens, my commute was approximately 30 minutes door-to-door. I would walk 5 minutes (two and a half blocks) to the subway, get on the E train, which is express in Queens, get off the 53rd & Lex stop, and walk 5 minutes to work. And it was pretty consistent. Although I've never measured it, I would say that the standard deviation was about 5 minutes. And it was the same consistency coming home.

Here in Cranford, we originally thought that we'd be taking the train into Penn Station, but it turned out that the bus was a much better option. It's faster because it's an express bus (no stops between Cranford and Port Authority), you get a seat, and it's much quieter/peaceful. Another problem with the train is that you would have to transfer at Newark, which is a nightmare! Hundreds of people getting off one train, funneling through two doors down onto a stairway, running across the floor, funneling through two doors up on to another stairway, and jamming themselves into another train. That got very annoying very quick.

The bus is not without its failures. It's pretty inconsistent with the arrival times, and most of the time you would have to wait for a few buses to pass because they were full from the previous stops. You can always stand, but that's not a fun ride. It's not easy to nap while standing! That seems to be getting better recently.

Over the last month or so, I've kept track of the time we leave the house (time on the car display), to the time I walk into work (clock on phone) to get an estimated door-to-door commute in the morning. It turns out that the average is 1:31 minutes! Keep in mind, this has been commuting with a pregnant wife. The standard deviation is 11 minutes. I, of course, created a spreadsheet to keep track of this. I've posted the results here, but I blacked out the time in/out. No need to know what time I've been getting to work! Today is also Sandra's last day at work, and we'll be staying over at her parent's place as our house continues to get work done. So this data set will ultimately change in the future, which is why I'm posting this up today.

If I had to break down the 1:31 (unofficially):

• 5 minutes to get to the bus stop from our house
  
• 12 minute wait for the bus
• 50 minutes bus ride
• 20 minutes subway walk and ride
• 4 minute walk to work from chaotic 53rd and Lex stop

Click the image below for a larger view of the results (so far):

Election Day and Politics

Yesterday Sandra and I exercised our privilege to vote for the next president of the United States. A little different here in Cranford than in Queens. It took us a total of 5 minutes, and 3 of those minutes were spent talking to two ladies who were running the polling station who have live in Cranford for the last 40+ years. Pretty easy. I remember waiting on long lines in Queens to go vote. Not fun, but I'd still do it.

We also appreciated that we actually got to meet some of the candidates who were running for Congress (both Senators and House of Representatives). We met, amongst others, Dick Zimmer (who lost to Frank Lautenberg for NJ Senate), Linda Stender and Leonard Lance (winner) who represent our district for the House of Representatives. On different days they all were campaigning on our train/bus stop and it was the first time I had the opportunity to meet politicians who were running for government.

Regardless of who we were voting for, after Barack Obama was declared the next president of the United States I felt a resurgence of my American pride. Yesterday's election was a historic one; one that I hope will galvanize the nation to unify, rekindle our patriotism, and stand together to work to make this country the greatest country in the world (which it is!). I felt the same way after 9/11. Personally, this election has a different meaning to me as I find myself thinking a lot about my future son/daughter and what kind of world he/she will be living in. Strange how quickly those thoughts have crept into my psyche. I can only hope that when our child is learning about American History in school, that November 4th, 2008 will be remembered as a great day, a new era, and a triumph for our country. Why not?

Kitchen Project Update

Progress report: The kitchen project is moving right along. We passed the electric, plumbing, and building inspections, and now the walls have been sheetrocked. This past Sunday I took up some layers of the floor (3 different linoleum patterns and a 1/4" layer of plywood) to make the floor even for the cabinets and new flooring (cork) that we're putting in. The plan is to have the walls taped this week, and we might possibly see some of these cabinets that we purchased!

Pictures of the update:

Happy Halloween

We weren't going to be home for the trick-or-treaters on Halloween, so we decided to put a bag of candy on our door with a sign that read, "Happy Halloween. Please take 1". Everyone that we told that story to had the same reaction, "Oh, that's candy is gone. And probably the bag too." We weren't so sure, but we also weren't confident. Living in the city, the chances that the candy would all go to the first or second person to show up at the door was pretty much a certainty. But how would our suburban town of Cranford fare? Well, we came back Friday night to find that our bag was still hanging on the door...and there was still candy! Thumbs up and good karma for you, kids of Cranford!